Sometimes it’s easier to write if you let someone else start and you offer your reply. Anyway, I’m kind of shy that I’d be telling you portion of my life five years ago and as far as I couldn’t forget, I had some kind of tormenting and pathetic experience.

Okay, time to be a bit more serious: My pages from the past five years? OMG! It makes me cringe, but there are a few things that I learned and there might even be a smidgen of style starting to show up.

Five years ago, that’s when I was 14 years old, have been so not easy for me to get along with other people because I was real shy and ashamed of myself, of my physical appearance.LOL! I was too short nigga with pimples and had really short hair. Just imagine how ugly I was. I often got tease by my asshole classmates. Because of this, I got my self-esteem low; I rarely participated in class and joined any curricular activities. I was afraid when people are looking at me from head to toe.

I’ve even been patiently working my way through those verbal abuses. Actually I’ve worked my way going to the gym during summer. I was so desperate to lose weight. And yeah! I lost weight. . I got lighter complexion sponsored by Belo Medical Group. haha! and had straight long hair. Its kinda bit of a lighter complexion than before. From then on, I started to talk to people, hangout, and party with them like hell. I started to boost my confidence and feeling dang good about it; I started to commit myself with a lot of school activities and had the chance to groove. LOL! . One thing that really made me boost my self confidence was when I joined the Charismatic Community in our school. I learned to deal with a lot of people with different experiences in life. I also had learn to be able to step back, very quietly, yet very intensely and not act too impulsively or overwhelmingly and learn to become very patient and really be consciously aware of what’s happening around me before I acted. There was an absolute awareness, a conscious awareness of what’s happening around me. I became aware of a sense of, that there’s a need to taken into account and so therefore tread softly, tread carefully, because wherever you go, it’s got to give you a result. All the way through this, I considered myself as more responsible and maybe more mature than I thought in the past years. The experiences changed my life more than I ever imagined it would be.

After having some kind of summon up of my experiences in the past five years, I know or at least I believe that there will be lots of changes and new experiences in the next more five years. Well, I can just imagine myself how fit and sexy I am at the age of 24 years old. I am so conscious of my health, so particular of the food intakes. At this age, I already manage my own business – clothesline boutiques, cakes and pastries coffee shop. However, being a part of the Charismatic community has really been a great blessing to me. Even if I see myself busy with my business and all, I'd still spend time serving the church. And I believe that this is where all the strength that I have always had and the resilience that I will always have and need to go on life. I see myself as open minded and someone who’s easy to approach and deal with lots of people in different walks of life.

That’s how I was and would be five years ago and five years later.

Labels: future, past, psychology